Linkin Park and revelation!

Linkin Park is blazing on one fine Friday evening… I don’t know whom to trust, no surprise… (everyone feels so far from me) … happy thoughts sift through dust and the lies… (Trying not to break but I’m so tired of this deceit) …

Well, not many would agree with that choice of song, especially on a Friday evening. Not after 5 days full of shit loads. Friday is more like partying, but why a song with dark words…

Here is a guy, 30 years of age, running from everything and everyone. This fool occasionally makes grave mistakes of opening his heart, life, and soul to complete strangers, preferring or rather pretending them to be his close friends.

Open-up, reveal the secrets, express concerns about the people you care and get blamed for them. You are a spy! You are a backstabber! You are a disgrace to this society… do one thing, why don’t you just die… It will solve lots of problems.

Well, dear pretenders and my so-called friends here is the thing. I won’t die that easily. I have a thick skin made of an elephant and rhino combined. Death won’t come easy for me not the way you folks want. I will die on my own terms. But it’s my heart… The soft, tender core, getting falsified on each occasion, betrayed, disgraced and sodden with guilt, an utter state of haplessness and disgust.

As Chester Bennington (front man of LKP) sings in his soft voice …  “I don’t know whom to trust, no surprise” … I wonder how appropriate the words… Whom do I trust? Who are my friends? Are they my real friends or just an illusion?

Perhaps, there could be a device someday in near future. An appropriate device to separate my heart from the body and locked it under a secret safe, like Davy Jones’s heart (Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest). Alas! That’s not going to happen in near future, so the only option is to run.

Run from family, parents, siblings, marriage, relationships, pretentious friends. Run from everything and when you fall, die. Or else, people will pick you up, express sympathy, help you to get on your feet and then out of the blue, put a knife into your heart and smirk…you better die, you good for nothing fella!

You die wondering what if…as everything gets blurred and you die with the lyrics ringing in your ear…I don’t know whom to trust, no surprise…

High pitch shrill…

Take everything from the inside and throw it all away,

Cause I swear for the last time I won’t trust myself with you

Alas! It’s too late.

 

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